so when you look at the pics, put ‘let me’ before the names… just tickles me…

Which reminds me. i got a very cool link from lady cheeky this morning of a radio show she did discussing ‘discovering sexuality after age 40. Take a listen: Sex and Happiness – Discovering Sexuality after Age 40 – WOW!

While you take a listen to that, hop on over to LetMeDoThis.com for more yum. there’s lots of oral and prettiness. it’s super accessible really.

happy happiness to you my little plums!
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New York, I Love You is this great collection of 11 film shorts into one movie, each story written and directed by a different person but, obviously, all contextualised by the big apple.

in this scene natalie portman and irrfan khan portray a hasidic jew (her) and indian jain (him) in a light-hearted but intense negotiation about a diamond sale. there is a familiarity to their banter that suddenly turns intimate when they start discussing her hair. every time i watch this i get a little weepy.

the clip comes in at the start of the hair discussion. unfortunately the sound is a little off, but if you can get the movie do give it a watch. it’s just lovely. the stories are beautiful and the cast outstanding.

he leaves soon back to canadialand. i will be sad.

Rick was horny. Rick could take an extra long lunch if he wanted, just as long as he got his work done by the end of the day. He wasn’t exactly hungry. Spending some time in bed between the warm soft folds of a woman’s legs for a while sounded much better than food, but who would be willing to accommodate him? He often spent time with his wife’s best friend, Cheryl, who liked to innocently tease him about his good looks, while secretly flirting with him when Donna wasn’t around. He hoped that all her flirting meant that she was sincere in finding him attractive.

As soon as he arrived home, he called Cheryl. Since she was a schoolteacher, she was off work and stayed home most of the summertime lounging around the pool. He was pleased when she answered on the second ring.

“Hey Cheryl, it’s Rick,” he said.

“Oh hi!” she replied, sounding excited to be hearing from him.

“What are you up to?”

“Oh about ten and a half inches last time I measured,” Rick said laughing at his own joke. Cheryl laughed too.

“Wow, your wife is one lucky lady.”

“I wish she thought so,” Rick replied, then before she could respond he quickly told her why he was calling. “How about having lunch with me?”

“When?” Cheryl asked.

“Right now?” asked Rick.

“We’ve talked about getting together many times. I’ve been wondering if you were really serious about it?”

“Well, of course I was serious,” said Cheryl. “I’d love to have lunch with you. Today is fine. I don’t have any plans.”

“Great,” said Rick.

“How soon can you get over here?”

“I guess I could come right now,” she said. “What would you like to eat?”

“I’ll eat you and you eat me,” Rick said, again laughing at his sexual provocativeness. Cheryl laughed. She was used to hearing Rick talk like that. It was how they always joked with each other, but even though they joked a lot, she truly wanted to have a look at his ten and a half inch cock that he claimed to have.

“That sounds wonderful, but I don’t think we’d get very full. So seriously, do you want me to pick something up on the way?”

“No,” Rick answered. “I have stuff around here we can eat.”

“OK, I’m on my way then.” Cheryl said and hung up.

Rick raced around the house, quickly trying to clean the place up a bit before Cheryl arrived. He ran a comb through his dark hair and threw on his favorite cologne just moments before the doorbell rang. He tried not to act nervous as he hurried to the door to greet his friend.

“That was fast,” Rick said as he let her in the front door. Then before she could say anything he closed the door and embraced her with a hard kiss on her lips. She opened her mouth and willingly let him explore the inside with his tongue. She didn’t resist at all, but instead melted into his arms, pressing her body and full breasts close to him. Rick could feel her as she pressed tightly into his already hard cock.

“Wow,” Cheryl said, when they finally released each other. “Now that’s how I wish I was greeted at the door every day.”

Rick smiled shyly and bent down for another passionate kiss, but Cheryl backed away. “I thought we were going to have lunch?” she said questioningly. “I’m not really hungry,” said Rick as he reached out and pulled her to him. “Hmm, I think you must be hungry for something,” she whispered as their lips met once more.

Without releasing her, Rick began to slowly move towards the bedroom. Cheryl willingly went with him. His hands reached down and began to unbutton the sheer red blouse that was hiding her luscious breasts. He slipped it off her shoulders and threw it towards the bed. The bra came off next and Rick couldn’t resist bending down to suckle at her ripe nipples. Cheryl groaned and arched her back, enjoying every minute of what Rick was doing to her. Her hands began to explore his body and he could feel the blood begin to pound as she stroked over his hard, engorged cock.

“Is this baby really ten and a half inches,” Cheryl asked as she rubbed her hands over the huge bulge in Rick’s jeans.

“I’ll let you measure it if you want,” Rick said, unfastening his pants and letting them drop to the floor. His dick was already poking over the top of his briefs with glistening drops of precum at the tip. Cheryl reached down and began to stroke Rick’s cock, feeling up and down the length and rubbing the precum at the top over the head making it slippery and slick. His dick grew even longer as she stroked it, making Rick want to let off a load for some relief from the ache in his balls.

“I can barely get my hand around it!” Cheryl exclaimed. She bent down for a closer look. “I wonder if I can even get my mouth over it.” She opened her mouth wide and engulfed the top of Rick’s penis. She sucked hard and shoved herself down towards the base of his shaft but was unable to get much more than just the head in her mouth. She pulled off and licked her lips. “Hmm, you taste wonderful,” she said as she swallowed him once more.

Rick gripped her head. Donna hated to give him blowjobs. He would beg and beg but the only time she would ever give in was after she was extremely drunk. Now Cheryl was willingly sucking him off acting as if she truly was enjoying it. Rick groaned and began to pant. His balls were pulling tighter. The excitement was too much for him and Cheryl’s tongue was driving him over the edge. He could feel the first waves of his orgasm beginning and he reached down to pull Cheryl away. She seemed to know exactly what was happening and refused to leave her new toy. The motions of her tongue increased, massaging the entire head of his cock while her hands stroked up and down the part that wouldn’t fit inside her mouth. Rick jerked hard as the first wave of cum shot out filling Cheryl’s mouth. She didn’t back off, didn’t even slow down. She swallowed what he gave her and sucked even harder as if wanting everything he could give. Rick gave in to his orgasm and allowed himself to fill her mouth.

By the time it was over, he could hardly stand. Cheryl stood up and kissed him sharing some of the cum with Rick that was still left in her mouth. “I’m sorry,” she said after ending the kiss.

“I know you probably wanted more than just a blow job, but I just couldn’t resist tasting that big cock of yours.”

“That’s OK,” said Rick. “I’m not finished.”

Cheryl looked down and a smile came to her face as she saw that Rick’s cock was still as hard as before. Rick reached down and began to work at the zipper on Cheryl’s denim shorts. They fell off of her as soon as he had them undone and he reached inside her silk panties to feel her wet slit. His finger came away soaked with slippery liquid. He had a feeling she was going to be a really wet ride. He began to massage her clit, while slowly reaching lower into her pussy. Cheryl’s legs gave out beneath her and they both fell to the bed.

Rick had his face down between her legs. He pulled her panties off and began to slurp away at the sweet honey that was flowing from her pussy. “Oh baby!” Cheryl screamed out. “Yes. Suck me. Suck me. That feels so good!” Rick continued to cram his face into her slit, working his tongue over her clitoris while fingering her hole at the same time. Cheryl bucked about, her vagina clamping down hard on his fingers. Rick was glad that the neighbors were at work and there was no chance of them over hearing Cheryl’s screams of delight.

“I think this is the best lunch I’ve ever had,” Cheryl said weakly, still trying to catch her breath.” I need a lunch break like this every day,” Rick said as he slowly crawled out of the bed.

- Sparky

I found myself in a rather uncomfortable position at a small downtown soiree the other night. We were well into the evening and enjoying the generous quantity of drinks and canapés, when I found myself cornered by Irate Wife who was two decibels away from causing an uncomfortable scene. She was fuming because her husband was spending a substantial portion of his evening with an old friend of his – a girl friend… as in friend of the female persuasion.

Wife was Pissed Off in big capital letters and her hubby was perfectly unaware

Sure, they’d drunken shagged once, like, a million years ago, but that was in the past and let’s face it, they’d been friends for a million years. Surely the ‘friend’ bit should’ve counted for something. But Wife was having none it. Wife was Pissed Off in big capital letters and her hubby was perfectly unaware, engrossed as he was by the animated discussion of his friend – or as Wife likes to refer to her, the Eastern Block Whore.

As I calmed Wife down with cooing and compassionate rationale, it occurred to me that this wasn’t just jealousy talking. This was a very fundamental sense of snubbery; his emotional connection to another women was a far greater threat than any moonlight dance their genitals could’ve done.

Wife simply couldn’t understand why he needed to talk to EBW when he’d chosen to marry her. Why, even after she’d discussed her feelings about this with him in such depth over the years, he still insisted on speaking to the hussy who was clearly only after one thing (what with her skinny jeans and hooker heels and hair flicking).

Men can have an emotional, sexually platonic connection to more than one woman, right?

It was like he was doing this on purpose. Or wasn’t giving it (or her) a second thought at all. It’s like she could figure out which was worse. Poor thing. I didn’t think he was giving it a second thought. There was, after all, nothing to give a thought to – he was just talking to a friend right? Men can have an emotional, sexually platonic connection to more than one woman, right?

I’m firmly in the camp of thinkers that believe men and women can actually be friends; that not every interaction is a veiled message to get jiggy with it. Hell we’ve built the Hadron Collider and will all be going to Mars soon, surely we’re capable of bypassing our reptile brain every so often? RIGHT?

But then that study came out. The one revealing that, in fact, men and women were not capable of being ‘just friends’. Last year, researchers at the University of Wisconsin-Eau Claire, US, ran a test where pairs of opposite-sex friends answered questions about each other. Turns out that while the women were cool with seeing their male friends in a purely platonic light, the guys in turn saw a wealth of possibility for ‘romance’. That given the opportunity, they’d jump at the chance of jumping their girl friend.

Did it mean that Wife had reason to freak out? Does it explain why I probably have more gay men as close friends than straight men? Does it mean there is some basis for petty jealousies?

The white coats are suggesting that thousands of years of evolution still win out against this crazy social notion of ‘just friends’

I went out on a few dates once with this guy who didn’t want to be friends after I’d hooked up with someone else. Not because his heart was broken, but because he ‘doesn’t do that’ (have girl friends) and the only female in his life apart from his family would be his wife. At the time I thought it pretty narrow-minded and sad, actually. So we parted ways and that was that.

And now I wonder, was he right? I mean, the white coats are suggesting that thousands of years of evolution still win out against this crazy social notion of ‘just friends’. And while I have many straight guy friends, I don’t have many that are close. In fact, in my experience, the guys that get ‘close’ to their female friends end up trying to hook up with them. Maybe instead of placating Wife down to a more acceptable volume I should’ve suggested going into full battle mode and tearing hubby away from his so-called ‘friend’.

But then I remembered, we’re all adults here and men are capable of polite interaction without the distraction of their romantic notions. At least I’m pretty sure of it. For an honest answer I’ll go ask my close guy friends, all two of them.

This article was first published on Women24.com, click through to see what others had to say…

This is no walk in la-la land ladies and gentlemen. marc blackie takes no fucking prisoners to the twilight zone. dark surrealism gets its kink on with erotica in his black and white series of photos and film. it’s one of those sites that made me want to jump up in class and shout: LOOK WHAT I FOUND! LOOK AT IT! LOOK!!!

sure it’s not everyone’s cup of tea, and i personally feel it veers too much to ‘art’ to be sexy-time hot, but some of those videos are quite…well…something.

the pic above is from the new film short, first person plural. i couldn’t embed any video from his site, but he’s got them all loaded up there so go check it out.

Find more about him and his work at Disappointed Virginity [clickety click]. I love that he’s generous with his work and not made it inaccessible with logins and paywalls.

happy monday, plum-faces
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how the fuck does this work? do you know? look. you’ll be aware that i’m not exactly the poster child for organised religion, so my choice of mother’s day postsecrets is hardly unbiased. but i wonder if this woman weighed up her lifetime of regret and self-recrimination for subjugating her self and desires to the church collective with the temporary pain of being ousted from the hive mind.

also. isn’t abortion bad in the eyes of the church? so this would’ve been a sin against the church to a avoid being shunned by the church. jesus. what a no-win situation.

the decisions we make ne?

Hi Dot
I am 22 years old and was a virgin until recently. My boyfriend wants me to try being on top and I am extremely nervous about it and a little insecure. I feel like I won’t know what to do and that I will just make the whole experience strange. Any tips?
Inexperinced non-virgin

***

Dear INV

Bless. this letter made me want to squeeze you and hold you tight and kiss you on your forehead. Let me just say off the bat that the whole thing is just strange. Sex is weird in the beginning man. All that body stuff and arms and legs and sounds and facial expressions and feelings… not to mention all the unexpected emotional and mental self-reflection it might spark. it’s just strange. So don’t worry about you making the experience strange – nothing you do can make the whole thing stranger than it already is.

so. ta-daa. first problem solved. you’re ok.

when it comes to being nervous, first, see above, and second, know that girl on top or ‘cow girl’ position is one of the easiest, most delicious and best positions for you to get comfortable with shagging in. here’s how i know:

He’s laying back and i am not giving one bit of fuck about what’s going on with him because i am busy sorting this virginity business out

when i first had sex it was a bust. i was all kinds of wtf for various reasons. let’s just say the evening didn’t end well. cut a long story short, i decide that this ‘him on top and trying to work it from there’ business was sucking as an idea. so i go back to his place the next day and push him back onto the bed, lift up my dress and get on top of him. he’s laying back and i am not giving one bit of fuck about what’s going on with him because i am busy sorting this virginity business out in the only way that makes sense – me on top and fully clothed (with a dress) and not giving a rats ass about what he needed. it was a bit mercenary, but this was business time.

being on top means you control how deep the thrust and how fast you move. so it’s especially fun for someone new to this.

There will be weird sounds and you’ll fall over and he’ll poke you in the eye with his elbow or he’ll drool on your face

and there’s another key word. ‘fun’. quit worrying so much. sex is fun. there will be weird sounds and you’ll fall over and he’ll poke you in the eye with his elbow or he’ll drool on your face (happened to me once. was a confusing time.) or something, until you both get used to each other… and then it will get even more fun. if you’re doing it right, being on top will be the most normal thing you’ll do throughout the course of your sex life.

as for the insecurity, you’re not supposed to know what you’re doing – you’re new to it! once you get your head around that and the above things, if it’s about how you look or your body, my first response is to be all: be free! love your body! you are a goddess! … i believe all of this, but i also think it’s important for you to be gentle on yourself and make things as comfy for you as possible until you feel comfortable enough to loosen those inhibitions. for me it meant keeping my dress on, for you could mean dimming the lights or wearing a skirt. being naked with someone is a new experience and you can ease into slowly, you don’t have get all cray cray hardcore on yourself. there’s enough going on.

also. two more things: use lube (sometimes vaginas dry up when they get nervous) and don’t fret if he goes a little soft while you’re finding your groove on his pogo stick.

good luck!
love
dot

This question was first answered on Ballz Visual Radio > Check out the video (quality isn’t so awesome on this one) >

Last week I started the Erotica#1 series on the blog with a piece I’d written. Other writers will contribute and the kind of erotica on offer will be super varied. This week’s piece is one that actually inspired the series and i’d like to do a quick intro here.

rahasya and wendy

I first heard Rahasya read an excerpt of his book at the Conscious Sexuality Conference in 2011.

“I would love to see you in innocent white schoolgirl panties …
with the little skirt … yummy.” He nuzzled her neck and stroked
a hand up her leg. “Have you been a good little girl?” he asked as
he grabbed and firmly squeezed a handful of her inner thigh. He
stopped nuzzling and looked her in the eyes, the large grin on his
face expanding.”

it intrigued me that anything ‘tantra’ could be so … naughty? he introduced the piece as an excerpt from his book Rocky Horror Tantra and ever since, I’ve been hooked.

so here’s what’s going to happen. you’re going to come on a little journey with me every other wednesday or so (i’ll be slotting in RHT excerpts inbetween the usual erotica) … a little journey through rahasya’s tantra teachings by way of the erotica he posts at the beginning of each chapter. i’ll post a the lines the caught my eye and you can click through to read the rest of the text.

You want to know what tantra really, really is?

but be warned: this is not everyone’s cup of tea. you want to know what tantra really, really is? RHT is an introduction.

“Tantra is the roughest, rockiest and unquestionably the most
horrible of spiritual paths. It is not a journey for the faint-hearted,
the weak-minded or the emotionally troubled. It presents serious
difficulties even to the heroic”

it won’t be your usual run-of-the-mill … but you know me better than to expect that, right?

Rocky Horror Tantra

9 1/2 weeks was my first visual introduction to the whole wet and messy kink. i’m not going to lie, WAM is SO not my thing. cooking, eating together and maybe feeding each other as a form of foreplay – yes; covering yourself in custard, chocolate sauce, slimy goo or oats as an intense erotic experience – no.

hot in memory. not on rewatch. alleyway/water yes. kitchen scene no.

but that’s me. and as you know, i like to venture into other tastes every so often for NSFW to make sure all your naughty selves are catered to.

so, get your mustard squirter ready, here’s some WAM from WamSplat.tumblr…

it’s the best free tumblr i could find. a lot of the sites are pay to view, which makes sense i guess, considering the cost outlay of all that food. yeesh.

i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again, i like the taste of sex and skin. introducing food like that just makes me either want to wash my mouth out of sweet or cover my vagina for fear of thrush. also, canned beans and spaghetti? really? we went there? ugh.

nevertheless. there you go.

Some more stuff:

• My column on food and sex (ne’er the twain shall meet) [clickety click]
• WamSplat.tumblr.com
• Ask Dot :: Carrots, sex and anal play [clickety click] 
• Do you know what figging is? #gingerbliss